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(no subject) [Aug. 6th, 2009|09:19 pm]
 There's a lot of movin' goin' on in my life. That includes on the internetsss.

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She's Up to Something [Jan. 29th, 2009|01:33 am]
[Current Mood |cheerful]
[Current Music |Three Bad Jacks - "Gone Gone Goodbye"]

I just cut my own bangs. It sounds worse than it is, I've done it before. I've been getting back into the rockabilly, after listening to much indie and electronic music these days. Please don't get me wrong - I love all the music I listen to, all the time, but I go in and out of phases and just have to switch it up every now and then. I couldn't wait any longer to get my hair cut, so I chopped away at my bangs on my own. It took me, I'd say, about an hour to do because these Bettie Page-style bangs have to be perfectly even. Well, I get as close to even as I can, anyway. I may have to trim them up a bit more in the morning, but I'm satisfied for now, until I have to leave the house. 

As I was searching for some additional rockabilly tunes today, I came across another song that I have been listening to on loop because I just can't get enough of it. It's called "Gone Gone Goodbye" by Three Bad Jacks. They are a rockabilly band, but this song in particular is a little less rockabilly, and has a more modern melodic rock/pop feel to it. It seems like it could be a bit more universally appreciated, in comparison to most rockabilly, which one usually has to have a taste for already. I just love finding new music, any day, no matter what style, as long as I can enjoy it.

It's 1:30 in the morning, and I can finally say that I haven't stayed up this late in a while. Dating someone who always has to wake up early, and goes to bed at a decent hour, has affected me in a positive way. I even find myself going to bed before midnight, by choice. I know, that's pretty crazy for me, considering the fact that a while ago, 2am was "early" according to my biological clock. I'm up late tonight for the same reasons that I used to be up late, though. Sometimes I just enjoy listening to music so much that it keeps me from wanting to go to sleep. I also chose an odd hour to decide I needed to cut my hair and both my mood and thoughts have been elevated.

Oh, I almost forgot to mention my first real Value Village haul! I went in there yesterday because I was craving a couple new articles of clothing. I came out with $30 worth of VV merchandise, which included:</div>
  • 1 pair of red skinny leg pants
  • 1 pair of blue jeans
  • 1 black cardigan
  • 1 dark denim jacket
  • 1 ring
  • 2 cute tops
  • 2 necklaces
All at 50% off because I work there! Plus, I realized that my supervisor forgot to ring in two of the shirts. Boo ya!!! :)

Unfortunately, she also scheduled me to work the entire weekend, all of the shifts being opening shifts. Booooo (minus the "ya.")

Tomorrow evening I'm on call ("to be there...") so I hope they don't need me because it's mini-Friday again (ALREADY?!) with Todd! Yippee.

Another reason one could tell that I'm in a super mood, is the increased use of words Mallory does not regularly use... i.e. "boo ya" and "yippee."

Anyway, g'night!

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Soul Mates or Dead Mates? [Jan. 21st, 2009|02:44 pm]
[Current Mood |happy]
[Current Music |Josh Rouse - "Directions"]

I was thinking the other day, about the idea of soul mates. This definitely isn't the first time, but it's the first time a certain additional thought came to mind. Many romantics like myself believe in the idea that there is one person in this world for each other person. I am one of those romantics but I still question that notion. I want to believe in it. However, my thinking expanded to a new thought on this topic. I was wondering, if there is indeed a mate for everyone, does that necessarily mean each person will meet that mate? If you think about it, the people that live their whole lives without feeling like they've found that one special person, could have just been unlucky. That soul mate of theirs could have came into their lives one day, only to have instead died suddenly the day before they were going to or were "supposed" to. We would never know this happened, if it ever did, so one could understand the fascination with the idea, and the possibilities of it. My "soul mate" could be out there still, or he could have died yesterday and I would never know. He could be out there, but in another hemisphere, to which I'll never make it, and thus will never meet him. Though, with the idea of "soul mates" and its connection to the idea of fate and things that are "meant to be," perhaps none of this applies. If we are "meant" to be with someone, maybe none of that misfortune will occur as an obstacle. But what about those people who never meet someone who compliments their being in that way? Does that mean that there really isn't someone special for everyone? "Who" or "what" decides these fates? 

Wow, this is lingering too close to the topic of "God" and religion in general so I'm just gonna stuff these thoughts in the glove compartment and maybe come back to them another day, I think...

Speaking of being with people though, of course I'm going to bring up Todd again. I'm going to see him tonight, and I'm actually really excited because I haven't seen him since Monday morning. I realize that sounds really lame, considering it's only Wednesday... but for the past while I have seen him almost every day, until now. We could have hung out Monday night but there comes a point where clothes just really need to get washed, before you find yourself having to wear shorts in -16 degree weather, and your dog needs to be reminded that you still do love him. Haha. Anyway, I've really been enjoying my time with Todd, and his little posse, who all happen to work at Sheehan's or are Sheehan's regulars, at least. His best friend Mike (who also happens to be the brother of his ex-wife) is dating a bartender there, who's straight from Edinburgh, Scotland. I met her sister, too when we all went to a big party on the weekend (which was a going away party for an employee of - yes, you guessed it - Sheehan's.) This was the night that I discovered the joys and then the subsequent pains of jello shooters. I have only puked on account of alcohol about 7 times total in my lifetime, and unfortunately this night was no exception. I'm sure Todd's toilet really appreciated it. Nothing like getting the puking-yer-guts-out thing outta the way early on in the dating phase of a "relationship." Wouldn't be the first time, which should really teach me something. But the only thing I've learned in accordance with alcohol and drinking it, is that I don't learn anything... not even from the worst of mistakes made under its influence. Alcohol is like that really lame boyfriend, who you know is no good for you. He gets you into trouble and you fight every other hour, yet you keep going back to him, if not for the temporary pleasures.

I'm totally in the mood for a couch cuddling, movie watching date tonight. Mmmm.
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Tee Oh Double Dee [Jan. 9th, 2009|01:58 pm]
[Current Mood |bouncy]
[Current Music |Kings of Leon - "On Call" (Live in Sydney)]

I've never been so excited for a second date before. I've never been so excited over someone I just met, before!

Let's hear it for chocolate-covered maraschino cherries! Baha.
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Men at Work [Dec. 30th, 2008|11:03 pm]
[Current Music |Teeter - "Standing at Your Window"]

No matter where I work, there's always got to be that one cute boy. That one boy who's good looking and friendly, and who makes me all flustered and nervous so that I screw up whatever I'm doing. As if I wasn't screwing up enough as it is, being the newbie and all. Jeeze. Hahaha... I think being single is more stressful than being in a relationship and knowing exactly how you feel about one person. There are too many doors open right now and I don't know which ones to close! My next step is to (somehow) casually find out if this guy is single, and that will narrow it back down to the regular plural amount of potentials on my mind lately. BLAH.


p.s. I do realize I'm 22 years old and am still referring to grown men as "boys" but, it's just one of those things "girls" do I think. Girls my age... it's one of those collective agreements... a mutual understanding, if you will. Men, guys, boys... for certain people and certain moments, the appropriate word just comes out.
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(no subject) [Dec. 29th, 2008|04:47 pm]
Everything is temporary; Nothing is meaningless.

Laughter, friendships, relationships, sadness, happiness, strength, wealth, sanity, smiles, youth, fun, grief, boredom, hunger, thoughts. Love. Life.
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Is my timing that flawed? Our respect runs so dry.. [Dec. 19th, 2008|02:09 am]
[Current Mood |thoughtful]
[Current Music |Joy Division]

I think everyone feels like they are "the bad guy" at times in their life when people don't react to their actions in the positive way that they've set it up in their mind for them... the way that they want them to in order for things to go smoothly on their own end. Really, they're not "the bad guy" but have just not been able to view or feel something from the other's perspective, while trying to do what they thought was a "good thing." For whatever reason -  be it that they're ignorant, or the more likely reason being that they just don't know how to, simply because their mind is configured differently. And they're not female.

I do understand what it feels like when you do all you can to be the "nice" person. Or really, you don't even have to try, you just do what you feel and what you feel is simply, care. But either way, it does suck when all you try to do is be there for someone, continue to appreciate them, be honest with them, and be as laid back as you can in a situation that could possibly be awkward to them. It does sting when, instead of them reciprocating that or just doing it in the first place, they ignore your overall existence. They shut you out, thus sending you the message that you're no longer significant. Not even friend worthy. But then, out of nowhere, they include you on their list for mass Christmas greeting distribution.

Confusion extrusion.

My feelings of respect and admiration never evolve into an ugly bitterness. The truth is that I don't understand one's ability and decision to turn off feelings and friendships with the flick of a switch. I've always valued my relationships, whether they be of the platonic or romantic kind. Even when I've grown apart from people, I've never been able to just slice any ties between us with a Samurai sword of resentment or regret. When I care for someone, I care for who they are. And unless they are becoming a "bad" person, I will never view them as one. We all have our inner "demons" but it's only when those demons become us that we lose ourselves and become the type of person others may need to stop appreciating.

The book of love and life, is a book of many chapters, but pages turn both ways. 
Sometimes, if you slam a book shut too fast, without warning, a person's fingers may get caught inside. Sometimes, they just need the whole story.


(I wish it were more of a recipe book and we could start from scratch...)
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Changing All Those Changes [Nov. 11th, 2008|05:25 pm]
[Current Mood |chipper]
[Current Music |Buddy Holly]

I'm going for coffee with Buddy Holly at 7! He's picking me up.

And his name is really Dave, but his glasses state otherwise.

Well rave on
It's a crazy feelin'
And I know
It's got me reelin'
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Hi, yeah, I'm fine [Oct. 31st, 2008|04:06 pm]
[Current Mood |content]

I feel better already. Well, for now. Probably because I'm talking to people right now, and have plans tonight with my best friend, and it's Halloween. 

But really. I've been thinking about things and I was being silly for a while. Someone else will come my way and he'll deserve me. And I'll deserve him. 

Now I just have to get my butt in gear and find a job sooner than soon. Once I have that, things will start to look up again. And I can apply to school. I'm in a determined mood right now. Yay, life! :)

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Seize the Day Planner [Oct. 2nd, 2008|11:29 pm]
[Current Mood |contemplative]

I look at people and wonder. I listen to them, absorb what they say. I wonder what's happening.

I reflect on a lot of situations that affect me, even in the smallest of ways. As long as they affect me somehow, they're significant somehow. 

Many people feel glad or proud or relieved when there is a new "advancement" in the world. I think about these so-called advancements. Simple changes or alterations are sometimes mistaken for an advancement, though.

Self-checkouts at Wal-Mart. Frozen dinners, ready in minutes. High definition televisions. Cellular phones. Mini-vans with built in DVD players.

Sure, all of these things appear to better our lives. The objects themselves are improved or just new to us altogether. But I look around at the people using all of these things, and I think of something I learned. Multiple things I've learned, actually. I know that nothing is perfect, and there is no such thing that can make good on something without having a negative effect on something else. 

I see the people in all those "marts" - the stores that sell "everything" at low prices. Or any store, really. No matter the alterations, it's the people who don't seem to change. The people who don't change the way they think. I see people who are constantly impatient - who become angry over the fact that they waited in line too long. They take out that anger on anyone around them and can never admit that maybe they shouldn't have expectations. One should never expect anything from anyone. One should not expect anything to go as planned, because we should all know by now that it's never been the way the world works. Why haven't we learned this by now? I seem to forget it sometimes, myself.

Why are we always so worried about sacrificing one thing, when at other instances we sacrifice important things for trivial things without even realizing it... without even thinking twice about it? We praise the makers of frozen meals without even thinking of what they do to our bodies. We curse at nice people at the checkouts because we have to wait in line to buy that frozen macaroni and therefore can't get home in time to watch our favourite T.V. show on our high definition flat screen. We don't want to sacrifice our time, yet we trade it in for a crap meal and high quality visuals. 

A lot of people are lost. They focus so much energy and money on striving for quality in life's distractions. What about the quality of life in general? There are bigger and better things all around us, and too many people miss them. It's like we're all creating a new world based on what we've convinced ourselves is important. What about everything we've already been offered by simply being born? Why is that not good enough anymore? Why is it that nothing ever seems good enough? I ask myself this, too.

A lot of these "advancements" in the world are causing people to be oblivious to what's in front of them. They are distractions. I once overheard a conversation that was going on behind me as I walked down a street in a busy city. One girl told another that she realized why so many people have to try so hard to meet someone - a girl, a guy, a friend, a partner - she said it's because everyone is so absorbed in all their little gadgets nowadays, that no one is even looking up long enough to notice anyone around them. I agreed with her in my head and kept that thought with me because it was so obvious, but somehow I was always too distracted to realize it myself. If it's not the headphones in their ears it's the cell phone attached to their head. It's the sidekick under their fast-moving thumbs or it's the laptop they're glued to in the coffee shop. It's even the camera they won't put down because they feel the need to take pictures of everything so that they don't miss anything. The reality of it is, though, that they're missing everything else that's going on. People become so closed in little boxes of their life. Most of us think too much about something instead of doing it. The singles spend half their lives doing everything they can to find that one person who is right for them - everything except chill out and live the other glorious parts of life. Almost everything good that has happened to me, has happened unexpectedly. I've often been focused on one thing, and missed out on another - and when I finally took a break, another path appeared in front of me and I was riding down it without even a chance to think about whether or not I was doing what I was supposed to do. The only thing we should really expect, is the unexpected.

The next time you're waiting in line to pay for something you probably don't even need, remind yourself that things will just happen and you should just let them. If you have to wait longer in line than you hoped, don't tell the cashier she's slow and try to convince her she's a stupid idiot on top of it. Think about what it is you're even in a hurry for, and what it is you're buying and ask yourself if it's really worth it. The next time you buy that frozen meal in order to save time, ask yourself what you're saving time for. If it's so you can watch a few commercials with a bit of dramatic plot in between, then maybe you should rethink what really is important to you. 

All I know about life for sure, is that it would be pointless without happiness. And I believe that real happiness comes to us through love. Find a way to enjoy great moments in life by surrounding yourself with things that actually will better your life. Listen to an amazing song, but share it with someone so that you can appreciate them at the same time. If you're going to watch a T.V. show, do it when you are alone or there is absolutely nothing else satisfying that you can do. And even if you can't satisfy yourself, take the time to appreciate someone else so that they can experience their own happiness. So many distractions and trivial things in life prevent us from living life the way we really want to. There are people around us who need our attention more than an electronic device or another form of toy. All those things will still be right where we left them. Relationships of any kind, can end without any notice. The people who are waiting around for us can disappear or die at any moment. There are billions of people and places in this world for a reason. Focus on the ones who bring good into your life and vice versa, and also keep an arm extended or a door open for any other influential people who may come along. Keep your head up and your ears open when you're walking down the street. Smile at that cashier, because you may be the only one all day who reminds her she's worth someone's time. And if there is already someone in your life who means something to you, let that person know it, any way you can.
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